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10 the green chapter 3

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old house.

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new house.

nothing has changed, and yet everything has. my kids are still obsessed with climbing into small spaces. but the small spaces are hidden within a bigger space than we ever thought possible on our salary.

so to continue the story, after that one night where we went to bed with butterflies in our tummies, things moved pretty fast. i went to view the house the next afternoon and knew about 3-5 seconds after looking through the front door that richard was going to love it. it was a wide, double-height hallway with the most amazing, vintage, black and white tiling. i can’t wait to post pictures and give you all a house tour.

i looked around the rest of the house, totally taken in by its old english charm and the vastness of its garden–it is 5/8 of an acre, on an old orchard, so i have some sweet apple trees!

the catch was this, the landlord was not and is not interested in modernising the house. if something is broken he will fix it, but he is not interested in replacing old carpets, old piping, old heating, or redecorating. it is rented out as is. sounds like a bum deal, until you get the catch…of the catch…if you will. he rents it out for super cheap and gives the tenants carte blanche to decorate how they like.

this was a huge pull for us. firstly, it is not much more expensive than our mortgage, but we gain a ton. and second, i don’t think i could bear living in a house that i could not rework. i am obsessed with putting my stamp on things and decorating and interior design and do not thrive in ugly spaces. i just don’t. i go back and forth on whether this is wrong or not, whether it is a personal contamination of our consumerist culture or whether it is the part of god that couldn’t handle the formless and void and wanted to see a little colour and light. i am sure, as with all things, it is a little bit of both. but, i digress!

my only concern about this super-cute, super-english cottage, was the heating. it’s old and the house is not well insulated. so i didn’t want to get a house where we paid tons more money on heating, only to possibly still freeze to death in winter. and if i am being authentic and honest, it wasn’t so much a concern as a full blown fear and anxiety ridden issue. i know, its heating. but it was the fear of the unknown and the financial fear (at this point richard did not have his new job!) and it had me tied up in knots inside. my crazy was spilling out everywhere. i couldn’t decide on whether i wanted the house or not. richard didn’t want to get it without my ‘buy in’ but he felt like he had faith for it. and someone else was coming to look at the house any minute. i was frantic and anxiety was gripping me (i will post more about this later because it started a healing journey for me…cause i was majorly overreacting…and that is always a red flag) and richard knew we needed some more time. so we paid the holding fee to buy us the weekend to think about it. £200 to buy us some breathing space, talking time and a few days to figure out why the heck i was freakin’ about some heatin’.

i’m ending there… don’t you love how i am trying to keep you in suspense, as if you don’t already know that we got the house and love it? yea, its a fun game to play. nighty night all, s

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